Ode to My Ladies; You’re Worth More
Nahamah Jackson-Brown is a sophomore at
By NAHAMAH JACKSON-BROWN
Observer Contributor
NOV. 1, 2007
Because it makes you smile
I’m telling you the things you want to hear
Because it makes me smile
I’m so mixed up
That I think you would rather me be something other than the girl you met
I started to change a lot of things about my self
Because I thought you would like me more than you know you did before
I’m wifey
No ring but you like me
I’m before all these other girls he talks to
Photo by Observer Staff
He buys me things
Tells me he loves me
Only cheated once or twice
Plays me in front of his dudes
But what dude doesn’t do that
My friends be trippin’ on some new stuff
Jealous of the love we share
Yeah sometimes he forgets that I’m there
And smiles in some other girls face
That’s normal he just wants to know he still got it
I know he knows that he got me
And that I am enough
He only hits me ‘cause he loves m
He told me once not even the stars and the moon was above me
That sounds cliché but forreal ya’ll it really is that way
We don’t go anywhere no more cause he would rather spend quality time wit me n the fellas
I bring them beers they make whoops and cheers
At the basketball games
My girls can’t come around no more
‘Cause they be lookin’ at him funny
My brother can’t come around
My baby said something about him owing him money
I love my bro
But even more than him I love my babes
I don’t see mommy and daddy to much any more
Since I moved in with cha boi
We share my car
So he usually works on weekends and keeps late hours all during the week as well
Man what a packed schedule he got
Them late hours he keeps kinda makes me scared
The neighborhood he works in is kinda of bad though I think
His clothes they startin’ to stink
Smelling like some flowers in the meadow
Smelling like some bed of rose pedals
But I know he love me though
He wouldn’t do what I thought he was doin’
When I asked him if he was givin’ my love a way
He told me I was crazy no way
Cause ain’t no other girl as stupid as me
You know I laughed
But he didn’t
I tried to do the math
But we wasn’t equal
Was this the nightmare from the night before
I didn’t know dreams could have sequels
If this ain’t a dream
Then I really must be stupid
Cupid is an evil dude man
He caught me with some wicked arrow
That is affecting my brain and bone marrow
‘Cause for some reason I cant get up enough strength to leave
He loves me told me that he would rather end his existence as well as mine
And I believe he would before he let me walk away
Even though I’m slow he’d rather keep me that’s what he said
If I leave again he told me he would beat me
Out in the open this time
My life is like a sad rhyme
Keep repeating the same stanzas
Like a scratched up CD
And no alcohol is in reach
So I can’t clean the lens
I’m caught up
In a rope that has no ends
It just extends and extends and extends and extends
The more I move
The more I get tangled
If I keep messin’ around wit him
I’mma get strangled
But he loves me though
Nothing like the times we have together when he’s drunk
Treats me like an angel
Then bangs my head against a wall
Not even noticing that I fall
And fall out of reach with humanity
I’ve lost touch with my sanity
The only things that are real
Are the dreams I have at night
Maybe these sleeping pills will help me win back my life
Sorry I’m interrupting your regularly schedule program
To bring you a public service announcement
Cause a true sistah cant sit an’ watch her gurl go down like that
Girl could you wake up from your dream
You livin’ behind a screen
Bein’ distanced from everything that use to have value in your life
You’re giving up all your hopes and dreams
I can’t sit and watch you
And not try to stop you
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